What I Was Feeling-When Tom and I Visited His Mistress

I knew that Tom didn't have many likable qualities from the moment I met him. However, I can honestly say that it was low (even for Tom) to cheat on Daisy. Maybe it was because he was my cousin's husband or maybe because I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt for something, anything. I didn't feel pleased or excited when Tom asked me to go to New York with him for the day, because I could sense it wasn't just for fun. He was on a mission. A mission that would stretch his selfish ways farther than even I thought it could go. Daisy was beautiful, and counted on Tom. It made me mad at him and upset for Daisy that he could just throw her away like she was leftovers from the previous night's dinner. I didn't like that feeling of us sneaking around behind Daisy's back. I felt she should have the right to know, but it simply wasn't my place to tell her.  To me, Myrtle Wilson didn't really have that many qualities that set her apart from Daisy anyway.The entire time I watched Tom interact with Myrtle, it made my disdain for him grow. I wish I could have punched Tom in the nose that day in the same way he punched Myrtle. Although it may sound terrible, it was a little bit of a relief to me when Myrtle died. It was only a relief to me because knew I wouldn't feel guilty about carrying the burden on my shoulders of knowing a very personal secret about the relationship between my cousin and her husband for so long.

What I Was Thinking-When Gatsby Died

Once I got to know Gatsby, I couldn't imagine why anybody wouldn't be lining up to be friends with him. He was loyal, passionate, rich, and just enjoyable to be around. That's why when Gatsby died, I was confused as to why there wasn't a huge crowd at his funeral, and why people kept saying negative things about him. Here was a man who threw marvelous parties every Saturday and didn't have a guest list, and yet all those people didn't even give him a second thought when he suddenly wasn't around anymore. I pictured myself living in Gatsby's big house, on every night expect Saturday. It must have been so quiet, mostly so alone. That big empty house with nobody to share it with. I continued to think not only what Gatsby's life was really like behind closed doors, but also about the meaning of life. Does money really buy happiness? How is popularity really defined if you can't even count your trustworthy friends on one hand? Is the world trying to attain this "American Dream" without knowing that it's not what is seems to be? With my mind racing with questions, I made the decision to go back to home. I didn't want to live like Gatsby anymore. I didn't want the money, the cars, the fancy clothes. I learned that all along I was perfectly content with my average life. Even though people may think the rich have it all, the life of wealth really is just overrated.

Why I-Helped Daisy and Gatsby Get Together

Some may say it's strange that I would be a witness to my cousin cheating on her husband and do nothing about it, but I don't think that's a fair assumption. What I mean by that is, Gatsby and Daisy had a special connection, a connection that I never for even a second saw in Daisy and Tom. Gatsby and Daisy could have just stared at each other from across the room in silence and have no other place they wanted to be, yet Tom and Daisy just looked at each other with empty eyes and hearts even if they were having a pleasant conversation. Plus, I liked Gatsby way better than Tom. I mean, he cheated on her in the first place so I didn't owe him anything to stop Daisy from being with Gatsby if she wanted to. Sure, Daisy could be superficial and careless, but she was so happy around Gatsby and I knew that Gatsby really loved her and would be willing to do anything for her. He was the exact opposite of Tom, who was very authoritative and rude and only cared about himself. That's why I left Gatsby's house as soon as Daisy and Gatsby started talking. I didn't want to interrupt the true love that they shared, a love that I wish I could have gotten to experience with Jordan Baker. Anyway, I knew that if I would have said something to Daisy and Gatsby in that moment, I would have been better off talking to myself because they were so entranced in each other that they wouldn't have even heard me.